Finding yourself in the service of others
Mahatma Ghandi said, “The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others”. It’s a quote that could illustrate Jon Owen’s approach to life.
When Jon was still a young man (he’s my age though, so I wouldn’t say he’s “old” just yet!) he decided to live a life of poverty and obedience. Which to many today sounds positively medieval. What it looked like in practice was living in the same community in which he worked, and literally opening the doors to his house to those in need.
This decision has shaped his life - and at a time where I see many men of my age group suffering from a crisis of self-knowledge (ie a “mid-life crisis”) Jon has got his feet firmly on the ground. His view of the world is radically different to most - it’s not about more money or things. It’s about people and learning.
And while this might sound highfalutin Jon is anything but. He’s humble and open. His advice is simple: listen, don’t judge, be compassionate.
I find his words and actions deeply moving and inspiring. Sometimes changing the world doesn’t have to be a complex search for meaning - all we need is to open our ears and heart to those around us.
Listen to Jon Owen on A Better World Blueprint on Spotify or Apple Podcasts.
Jon’s Blueprint:
Some ideas from Jon on how he has lived his life of purpose
Who is the person who most inspires you?
“My wife, she's my co-conspirator in life. When I did the two week sign up course [his first volunteer assignment], she was already working there. She'd opened a little two bedroom flat to women who were coming with their kids, contemplating their next steps in relationships that involved significant coercive control and violence. And so I watched her live her life out beautifully. It has been such a beautiful journey we've been on.”
Do you have a saying that helps guide you in life?
“Well, there are really two. One's a quote from Arundhati Roy, one of my favourite authors ever. And she says that, ‘A new world is on her way and on a quiet morning, I can hear her breathe.’ And I just love that. It's how we engage in life invitationally, meaning, that a life of purpose isn't about kicking the darkness till it bleeds daylight. It's about staying open and remaining alert to the prompts and the whispers that lead you.
“Another one of my favourite quotes is that, ‘I'm just a beggar helping another beggar find bread’. So that's kind of the guiding principle for me that I return to.”
Is there a book, movie or piece of art that's had an impact on your life?
“Well, The God of Small Things is a book that I adore by Arundhati Roy.
“But if I could be cheeky and say there's an album that really had an impact on my life. Every day in Year 12, which was 1993, I listened on a cassette Walkman to Rage Against the Machine's self-titled debut album that was released in 1992. And I loved it. Listened to it every day. You know, I was in bands and played guitar and they were my idols and heroes and they rocked out so hard. But then as I kind of engaged in the purposeful life and the life of justice and social justice, I realised just how deeply significant those lyrics were.
“And particularly to a migrant to this country whose looks back then were very different. It was not unusual for there to be one Indian family in the whole suburb back in Australia in the era I grew up in. So you were a novelty, you were an oddity. Dad used to say people will form their views of Indian people based upon how you act. Which for a seven year old kid, to put the weight of a billion people on their kid's shoulders, it's unfair. Don't be angry, be docile. And so to embrace those lyrics at times, when we were getting involved in political issues or when we were fronting up at the justice system with people we were advocating for … the lyrics rang true. One of the lines in the song Freedom is ‘Anger is a gift’. It's not always the enemy.”
What's the best thing you ever did?
“Learning to apologise. I am who I am because who has nurtured me, who has cared for me and loved me and been in relationship with me. It doesn't come without hurting people as well.
“At times unintentionally, but sometimes unthoughtfully. And so I never want to lock in on a version of my story that says, I'm great, get out of my way. There's this beautiful story that's really not very well known. The founder of Wayside Chapel was a guy called Ted Noffs. He had this massive stroke and so he was incapacitated the last eight years of his life.
“He was in a nursing home and everyone who came and visited him, he could only say two words and he would grab them with his one hand that worked and he dragged them in and he'd say, whispering to the ear, ‘I'm sorry, I'm sorry’.
“I think there's a beauty in that. We can't change this world without being so passionately committed and that passion can easily overflow and destroy relationships and friendships. I've got my list of people I need to grab with my one remaining hand and say sorry to when the time comes as well.”
Listen to Jon Owen on A Better World Blueprint on Spotify or Apple Podcasts.